I’m sure about 99% of all our readers has a list of items they need in case of a zombie apocalypse. A lot of you probably have grab bags laying around, a cache of guns and/or other items to be prepared for anything. Well, it’s time to add a few items to that list that will definitely increase your chances of survival during a zombie apocalypse.
- Grappling hook and rope
Yes we’re going James Bond, or General Admiral Aladeen if you’re from that side of the world. Why would you carry around a huge metal hook, connected to about 30 meters of fucking rope you ask? Well zombies can’t climb, they can’t do cat crawls on a rope and they also can’t walk a rope between buildings. Don’t you just hate it when you’re scavenging a town, go around a corner and see a horde of zombies standing around? Anyone remember that scene from The Walking Dead with Rick on his horse in Atlanta? Wouldn’t it be useful to swing a hook to a low rooftop and just climb to safety? Or being able to reach all those fire escapes that haven’t been lowered all the way? Or getting to the next rooftop without needing to go down to the streets? Anyway, make sure the rope is as long as possible, the hook not too narrow/small and the rope thick enough to climb comfortably. When purchasing the rope, grab it with both hands and put as much weight on it as possible. If you get the feeling the rope slips or burns your hands, get a thicker one. Added bonus: You can use this over and over again, unless you go rooftop to rooftop and just one way. Get a second hook somewhere so you can improvise a new one if you leave this one behind, for some reason.
- Latex gloves
Bring a box of latex gloves and always keep a pair in your pocket. You don’t want to use your normal gloves to search zombies, they’re usually made of fabrics that absorb liquids like blood. Don’t use your precious gloves on any zombie, but select the ones that look most promising. People who are going to turn into zombies probably were trying to survive, so most will have useful items on them. The zombies you don’t want to search will look like they got taken by surprise and stood no chance, don’t waste your time and gloves on them. These zombies will most likely look like former soccer moms, school aged children and young adults, hipsters, office workers and other groups of people who most likely carry nothing of value. Now the zombies you want to go for are former police officers, military personnel, paramedics (probably an ambulance around), people who wear outdoor clothing and others who look like they might be useful. Perhaps look around the parking lot of gun stores or cars with NRA stickers or 2nd amendment stickers on them.
- Mirror on a stick
Yes this will be insanely helpful! Need to peek under a door to see if you wont run in to a horde of zombies? Check a corner? Use the mirror! Check your asshole for ticks? Want to see if that zombie chasing you did scratch your back? Endless possibilities and uses for a simple mirror on a stick. You could even use it to start fires, signal a helicopter, or check if your face camouflage is well done. Buy one of those checkpoint car inspection mirrors, or get creative and make your own. It will be well worth it.